We Used to Be Friends

I'm not sure where else to turn to. There's this feeling that's been creeping up on me, and it's finally hitting me like a mac truck:

i am alone.

my friends are just friendly aquaintences now. my guild are casual friends but they arent the same as the best friends i used to have.

as i face moving across the state i'm struct by this inescapable truth. that maybe i'm more like Sandra Bullock in While You Were Sleeping than i ever thought i would be.

Dedication

I never thought that of the three of us, I'd be the one to stick with this whole running thing but it seems I am. It's a little daunting thinking about driving up to seattle by myself to run, by myself, but I'm at an impasse and I'm certainly not going to let other people hold me back. Because if there is one thing all this training has told me, I'm pretty damn capable and I don't even need other people encouraging me or rewards or anything. It's personal. It's for me. And if that means I gotta go it alone I guess that's that.

Not to say I'm not disappointed or sad because yeah, all those things are true too but what can you do about it?

Vacation Finally

Finished up all my schooling for summer quarter, buckle your seatbelts ladies and gentlemen for workworkwork. I'm aiming to pile on as many hours at work in the next three weeks as possible and get a jump start on my car payments for the next couple months, woo hoo.

School starts in about 2 1/2 weeks. I've decided not to overload myself. I'm going to try and transfer the 8credits I earned at TESC and take 16 fall quarter and then take >/=6 credits winter quarter, depending on how many credits SPS takes from TESC (it's really iffy transferring their credits but better to do it now rather than later)

If I could work full time for 8 months I feel pretty confident I could pay off my entire car loan which would be a huge huge thing. We'll see. I have to convince my father going off his medical for 8months isn't the end of the world though which could prove difficult.

I bought a bike. I haven't been running as much (more like 3-4 times a weeks = 9-12mi/week) but I've been peddling around a little more.

Coffee  Fest is coming up, yay. And we're hiring new people at work. Hopefully they are pretty bimboes *sigh*

On the running trail.

There is something extremely excapist about running. I can do it, and for half an hour I don't have to think about work or school or doing homework or when I'll find the time to sleep and get everything done in between. All I have to think about it, are my shoulders relaxed? How is my pace? How far? How many repeats left?

Later in the day (since I usually try to run before noon) I often find myself stuck at a table drinking coffee working on homework and wishing that I hadn't eaten in the last hour because I'd rather be out there hitting the road or biking or something, anything, just get me out of this tarea hell. (what's the spanish word for hell?)

The pace is steady all this week, 5run/1walk (5x). Not too difficult.

34 hrs at work next week THANK GOD. I'm just about out of money. If my parents hadn't insisted that they pay for half my gas I would not have been able to cover my credit card bill this month. I just haven't worked enough to cover that and my car payment. Yikes. Payday tomorrow though, yay!

And of course, by no money, I mean no money I allow myself to touch. It doesn't include investing money and tips but I'd really prefer not to dip into those. You know.

I have one final left tonight and then I'm finished with SPSCC summer quarter. The relief is almost palpable. I feel fairly confident that I will pull As in all my classes but there is always the potential that if I get a B or something on this spanish final it will pull my grade down. I don't really think so but it's better not to be cocky. I think if this wasn't summer, if we had had 3 more weeks with the material and therefore about an extra week practicing chapter 4 (which introduces all the irregular verbs) I would feel more confident but I just haven't worked with these words as much, it's harder to keep all their meanings straight in my head.

I always find myself updating at work. It's a good place to camp out and study for an hour before allowing my mind to wander. It's amazing, I'm marking my one year anniversary working here along with michelle and claire. Michelle calls it our birthday. Pretty amazing I've stayed here a whole year when I could only stomach two months at my last job.

So, over an hour writing in a blue exam book for teen films has decimated my thumb, ta for now.

Coming to the end

I'll admit, it's been a fairly tough week. I did a lot of reading, fell behind a little on my article reading and film viewing, but feel pretty good about my article writing for weekend Seminar. Yay? I haven't been sleeping as much so running has been a little more difficult towards the end of the week but I haven't missed a day, I'm still on track. Yay!

I have 3 days left at SPSCC, 1 written final, 1 spanish final, and 1 powerpoint presentation for art class. But I feel fairly good about all of these things, semi- prepared. Tomorrow and tuesday I'll be hitting the spanish book pretty hard but otherwise I think they shall end up alright. I just need to power through all this and then snag as many hours at work as possible.

No writing or really, anything creative, accomplished this week. I do really want to work on a short Final Girl Horror script though, end of this month and september. I also looked at some prices for minidv camcorders but the cheapest "good" one I could find was still around $200 and I'm almost positive it's the same or 1 model upgrade to my sister's camcorder, though how that happens I blame on freaky genetics. 

As ever, film remains the great elusive mistress.

Quick Post

About to run off to school but I haven't blogged in a few days so I thought I'd make a quick check-in.

Stayed on schedule for running. Starting week 2 with 2minRun/1minwalk repeats (about 30-45% harder than last weeks tempo runs) but it's all good.

Two weeks left of SPSCC, we're in the homestretch. I've got some ideas about cutting out a full quarter at SPS and transfering to Evergreen this winter, which means i could vie for a spot in the Rainforest Ecology program (which spends 3 week in Costa Rica, TO DIE FOR). We'll see how it goes. I have to finish up summer quarters at both schools first.

Swamped in classwork. I have a ton of Spanish EC to work on, 7 slides for a ceramics presentation, books and articles and movies to watch for both films and something else i'm missing I'm sure. BUT, I have tomorrow afternoon off which is a first so I think I'll take full advantage and get as much as I can done for this week.

Running to school now, chau!

Training Day and Deluge of Schoolwork

I had to skip ceramics class this morning to work on my Buffy collage due in Teen Film today. It turned out pretty brilliant looking if I do say so myself though so I think it was worth it. It just means that I'm going to have to paint like a crazy person tomorrow to get everything glazed for the weekend >_<

I have to watch two movies for history according to film by friday as well so I can return them to Blockbuster. Nothing too difficult, I think I'll get started on JFK after Film.

I'm quite excited to see everyone's collages today. I hope that I haven't puffed mine own up in my head. Despite some of the less than spectacular films we've watched, altogether I've found the class very stimulating and eye-opening, really challenging how I tend to passively watch films.

Third day of training went well. I went running around the westside. The only real annoying point came when I got stuck at a light and further held up on the corner by a fire engine. The sidewalk light refused to let pedestrians cross for probably five minutes so I finally just gave up and ran back the way I came. It's all par for the course though, yes? Meagan's agreed to meet up and run with me on Friday, yay! There is something extremely zen about running with a vague purpose. Something very relaxing about the whole experience. I'm quite enjoying myself. It makes me feel excessively productive.

Today I shall also attempt to work a bit more on the YA Short. I forgot to yesterday, mainly because I was so busy running from class to hair to class to work to homework. I shall be quite glad once August is over and life returns to a slightly normal pace.

I have to say though, possible side effect, I've become totally addicted to milk. Its so full of calcium and potassium (which are essential nutrients) somedays I feel like I can't get enough of it. Yom.

I think I'll try to go to yoga on Friday. That sounds like fun.